An Ethel Among Mermans (thornwolf) wrote,
An Ethel Among Mermans

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Long Awaited Details

so all of you have been wanting details of my trip to new york so here they are. im going to state the titles of each story and a brief description of what the story's about. you may click the cut tag "read more" if you choose to see the rest. here goes:

First Night There
Mom and i were going to stay at Tav's grandmas house until morning so we didnt have to drive all the way to manhattan to get settled. His grandma was out of town and to make us feel more comfortable, Tav stayed with us. Before sleeping, Tav and i decided to head out...There was a preview of XXX at the movie theatre he works at. He wanted to take me so id get to see the movie before it opened and also meet his friends. His friends kinda scared me at first but i got used to them pretty quickly. The movie was pretty cool but my fave part was Rammstein doing this whole concert thing in the very beginning of the movie. the rest of the movie was only good cuz vin diesel was in it prolly buy it just for the Rammstein part *drool*.
We went back to his grandmas house and mom was asleep so we decided to stay up. we sat in the kitchen and had some tasty New York water. i hate water normally but NY water is the best =) we found some Care Bears books sitting on the table that his grandma had and we decided to read them and find out all the names of the bears. as we read them we made fun of them and made up our own story. apparently the care bears are child molesters.

I already told you this story, but theres more to it. you know that crack guy mom was talking to on the subway? well...he had a porno tape with him. he dropped it and was too embarrassed to pick it up and apparently mom had started laughing about it and THATS how the conversation started. *sigh*
thats all for that chapter

Tav's Work
Tav works at a formerly United Artists movie theatre. Its now called Regal cinemas but the cool part is, Tav is now a manager and the maintenence man, so i get to see him all dressed up and cute and stuff and i also get to see him all manly with his tools and such. However, the customers are some of the dumbest ive ever seen!....
here are some examples of some real conversations with real employees and really dumb customers:
customer to concession stand person: hi, did you know you have a roach walking across all the candy?
employee: oh dear im so sorry! *kills bug*
customer: okay...ill have this and this and this *orders all the candy the bug had touched.*
employee: hello sir what can i get for you?
customer: yes id like 2 hotdogs please
employee while getting hot dogs: would you like mustard?
employee: what? no...
customer: yes you did!
employee: so you dont want them then?
customer slamming hot dogs on counter: no!
customer then later comes back for the hot dogs....
customer: i want my money back these nachos are too salty
employee: where are they?
customer w/ empty tray and empty cheese container: i ate them
employee: we cant give you your money back if you ate them
customer: why not? i didnt like them!
customer: the first movie...something "eyes". what is that?
employee: "eyes wide shut"
customer: i do not understand
employee: its like the idiom "eyes wide open"
customer: dont call me an idiot!!!
concession employee: how may i help you?
customer: yes i would like a small...*to son* Jesus Christ will you stop whining?! another word and ill have the bad man eat you!!!
son: (cries and hides in horror from the concession stand employee)
customer: Oceans 11 has subtitles right?
customer: but its a Spanish movie right?
Tavis: no. Brad Pitt's in it
customer, all gay like: oh nevermind!!
employee: down the ramp to the left
customer: whats a ramp?
customer standing in the men's room doorway: wheres the bathroom?
employee: how many tickets would you like
customer: 2 adults and 3 children
employee: where's the 3rd child?
customer to her husband: OH MY GOD YOU JERK! you forgot Mike in the car!
theres a sign out front that reads "United Artist-Happy Halloween"

kids jumping up and down: we wanna see Happy Halloween mommy!!
mom: What is that Happy Halloween about?
employee: its not a movie. Happy Halloween =)
Those are just SOME of the stupid things that go on at Tav's theatre. they have a whole book dedicated to the stupidity of the customers.
They even get calls from people saying "why dont you have better movies? im very disappointed in you." and all they can say is "im sorry, ill try harder?"

Thorn 2: wolf in the city

Tav decided that he was gonna take me to see some sights, and i must say i was completely amazed! first, of course, we went to see the balto statue.
im afraid of subways though..cuz sometimes crazy people come and shove people in front of the trains trying to cleanse the human race or something like that...
balto was wonderful =) after that we went to FAO schwartz. oh god! ive never seen so many life size plushies in all my life! i felt like i was in the movie "Big". there was so much stuff to look at! i just HAD to buy i got a little fox plushie which of course, i took pictures of for CW. after that we went to the empire state building and i got some pictures of buildings for Tiffalynx. The buildings were so huge!!! the empire state building was awesome though but for those of you who are Sleepless in Seattle fans, theres no way Meg Ryan could have gotten up there in time to meet Jonah and Sam before they left. She would have had to go through a metal detector, stood in line, bought a ticket, went up an elevator, walked 6 flights of stairs, went up another elevator...etc....*sigh* so much for realism.
Tav picked me up so i could see some things better and this little girl about 9 years old says to him "is that your sister" and he goes "no this is my girlfriend" and she and her friends get all giggly and go "awwwww that is so cute!!!!" o_0 since when does he kiss his sister anyhow?

we would have gone to Ellis island, but from the staten island ferry i saw the statue of liberty 6 times if not more in total. i just didnt get around to it =/

Tav and i went to a very expensive dinner at a restaurant thats at the bottom of the empire state building. i forgot what it was called but it was very good and i wasnt able to finish half of my chicken marsala, it was huge! I just felt bad for Tav's wallet =/

Okay thats it for now, ill have more later. im gonna take a bit of a break and then ill get back to more stories =)
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