An Ethel Among Mermans (thornwolf) wrote,
An Ethel Among Mermans

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The haul

Dear households of Pacific Beach,

Unless you want to receive another haunting by a very very sad ghost next year I suggest you revise your candy offerings. Recycling your unwanted Valentines Day heart candies is not being true to the Halloween holiday spirit. That aside, they're unwrapped, and judging by the places I've found candy hearts wedged between on many occasions I certainly would not want them in my candy bag next year. If the hobos in Mission Bay don't want em then niether do us ghosts. Chalky tasting hepititis encrusted lint wafers are one Halloween surprise I can do without, thank you. Secondly, New Years poppers are not candy. Giving 5 year olds plastic tubes loaded with gunpowder and an oh so tempting pull string is a lawsuit waiting to happen. While this ghost quite enjoys the occasional exploding object, I'm sure the Spiderman and bumblebee would not appreciate a face full of smokey sparks.

As for quantities, less than 1lb of candy is not sufficient anti-haunting bribery.

Be seeing you next year.


PS: That earthquake you just felt? Yeah, that was me expressing my displeasure after having found that most of my Reeses peanutbutter cups are the white chocolate kind :(

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